


what if we rewrite the stars?

by squishychan



Series: lgbtq+ svt [1]
Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Agender Character, Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - High School, Discussion of Abortion, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gender Dysphoria, Genderfluid Character, Heavy Angst, Implied Relationships, Long-Distance Relationship, M/M, Past Relationship(s), Trans Female Character, Trans Male Character, Unplanned Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-11
Updated: 2018-07-08
Packaged: 2019-04-21 03:48:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,001
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14276265
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/squishychan/pseuds/squishychan
Summary: university life is supposed to be simple; save exams and shitwhich is exactly why a baby complicates everyone's lives





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> if they're a girl, then they're trans, k? kay
> 
> this is a hs & uni au so yeah :3
> 
> other relationships will only be implied

Seungcheol watches with a weighted heart, rusted chains tinkling around the crimson organ, as Jisoo and Jeonghan board the gleaming plane. Bright, cheerful smiles plastered on their faces, meager suitcases in hand. It makes Seungcheol feel slightly faint, twirling twin ribbons of nausea dancing in his stomach.

 

The pair waving excitedly from the sliver of the tiny window, rolling up the cream covering, blowing Seungcheol tons of kisses. Said male taping a forced smile on, no doubt looking fake as fuck, but all in all, he really can't bring himself to care.

 

❀

 

The semester starts off rather uneventfully, Seungcheol accommodating to life without his two doting boyfriends by his side, finding the shift surprisingly easy. Blatantly ignoring the little wriggles and flutters from within his womb, playing it off as merely indigestion. Despite the snugness of his jumpers telling otherwise, the nonstop morning sickness clinging to him like a blood congested leech.

 

Falling asleep in lectures becoming commonplace, choosing to sit in the back of the class, lest the professor picks up on his newfound habit. Rushing out the double doors when the lesson is finally finished, ferocious hunger gnawing at his bones. The little parasite inside demanding to be fed, Seungcheol greedily gorging on sweets until he's puking liquid sugar. His clammy forehead resting against the cool porcelain tiles of the grimy washroom after each grueling session.

 

Yet he dare not tell Jisoo and Jeonghan, more so he simply _can't_. Not with the two younger males having been accepted into the college of their dreams, their future having been handed to them without so much as a fuss. Served on a sparkling silver platter, champagne glasses to boot.

 

A baby _wasn't_ supposed to be part of the equation. No way, _no how_ , his lecture on using birth control given to Chan coming back to bite him in the ass. But life likes to fuck with you, throwing a curveball where it _isn't_ needed.

 

❀

 

Seungcheol is sitting in his dorm, scrolling through various sites on his beaten up computer, researching the topic of abortion fervently, a trashcan seated next to him, the fucking raspberry tea wikipedia suggested drinking doing absolutely nothing to help curb his bothersome nausea. Eyes skimming each article, picking up only the bits of information that really stood out—the bare minimum. Words like _"_ _pain_ " and " _the ability to conceive again_ " highlighted in neon yellow by his brain.

 

_It's for the best, I'm only doing this because it's absolutely necessary._

 

He feeds himself lies, which virtually does next to nothing in cranking down the camera lenses of life. But hey, it's worth a shot.

 

❀

 

 "Jihoonie," Seungcheol whispers, the petite girl flipping through a glossy, thick textbook. Her nose scrunching up in distaste at the nickname, catty eyes flickering up to meet his own.

 

"Hmm?" She mumbles, tinkering with a strand of fried, cotton candy pink hair, a cute sakura blossom barrette pinning her choppy bangs back. Closing the book shut with a dull thud, fingers drumming on the cover in boredom.

 

"I'm pregnant," He says, tone holding an air of indifference, as though he was simply commenting on the weather. Not discussing something so major and life altering. It didn't feel real—and most definitely _not_ right.

 

Jihoon looks up, as if trying to decipher a code, obviously not believing the older's words.

 

"This," She pauses, choosing her words carefully, with the utmost precision of her very nature, tongue darting out to lick at her lips, "Is this some sort of joke? Because if so-"

 

Seungcheol digs into his tattered red backpack, keychains clinking together, fishing out a coffee splattered envelope, oily fingerprints scattered near the opening. A smudge of grease from the crappy hamburger he'd eaten after the ultrasound on the backside. He slides it over to her, holding his breath subconsciously. Jihoon hesitantly takes it, and Seungcheol swears he sees her hands tremble, prying out a slip of gray.

 

She turns it over, and sees a pool of inky blackness, in which rests a fuzzy, little white blob. Actually two, that is if her eyes aren't unknowingly creating optical illusions and shit. The one to the right labeled "BABY A" and the one at the lower left labeled "BABY B". But maybe Seungcheol's just fucking with her, gaze drifting to the top of the photo, but nope, as there in all caps, is "CHOI SEUNGCHEOL" inscribed in ugly, bold font.

 

❀

 

Seungcheol glances around nervously, tugging an old beanie down over his flushed ears, pretty certain his face is in the same exact state. He hears Minghao let out an exasperated sigh, yanking the sleeve of his burgundy sweater harshly. Practically having to drag him into the sterile smelling clinic, their magenta sundress swishing around their ankles as they did so.

 

"How the fuck did you manage to come for a confirmation last time," They more or less so mutter to themselves than ask Seungcheol, allowing him to slip his hand in theirs, interlocking and lacing perfectly. But Seungcheol doesn't reply, simply squeezing Minghao's hand tightly as they walk through the sliding glass doors.

 

Minghao shoos him over to the waiting area, the older shifting uncomfortably in the stiff seat, visibly calming when Minghao returns. 

 

"I signed you in, making up a lie about being your brother. Hope you don't mind," They say, an unreadable expression stuck to their face, probably having to do with the expectant mothers openly gawking at them. Little kids pointing with chubby, jammy fingers, practically screaming "Mama, why is that man wearing a dress?". High pitched voices full of curiosity, one women scooping her child into her arms, terribly embarrassed, yet still somehow accomplishing to shoot a deadly glare at Minghao.

 

_I am no stranger myself._

 

"It's fine Hao," He replies softly, eyelids drooping, this whole pregnancy thing really tiring him out. "I'm sorry for being so troublesome," Leaning against Minghao's bony shoulder, definitely not as comfortable as Jeonghan or Jisoo's, but he makes do.

 

"You're not hyung, trust me. If you were, I'd be bitching about it," Minghao attempts to joke, but their banter doesn't quite reach their eyes.

 

_It mirrors me to the dot, ironically enough._

 

❀

 

"Cheolie? Are you okay?" Soonyoung asks, her normally chipper mood sprinkled with concern. Seungkwan humming in agreement from where he's sprawled out on the furry rug, Hansol curled into his side, the older's hand tracing shapes into his sweatshirt. A half eaten can of pringles near the pair's feet, crumbs crushed into the multicolored fibers, which Seungcheol can confirm will be a bitch to hand-vacuum out later on.

 

Seungcheol shrugs nonchalantly, the trio's piercing stares ripping gashes in dreadfully thin paper. Because who would be? A bomb dropping down onto his peaceful, candid lifestyle, throwing routine out of the ever growing fissure in normality.

 

"I guess?" Sounding more like a question rather than a solidified answer. "I can't really say for sure, being pregnant is like an out of body experience for me. You know?"

 

He's met with stuffy silence, three sets of dark eyes blinking dumbly up at him. He'd find it comical if weren't for a fifty pound weight sitting on his chest.

 

Hansol mumbles something in English, Soonyoung owlishly gaping at him, Seungkwan's lips parted, perplexed.

 

"Oh," Soonyoung says softly, her voice uncharacteristically smooth, sharp edges blunted.

 

"Yeah,"

 

❀

 

"You're gonna need maternity clothes hyung," Wonwoo states, baritone voice cutting through water. 

 

Seungcheol flinches, that single word making his throat swell up. A sickly feeling hugging all the wrong places on his body, mapping out what once was.

 

_Maternity, maternal, motherhood-_

 

"We'll get there when the time comes Wonu," Jun counters, quickly changing the topic, and Seungcheol is so incredibly grateful for her ability to read the air. Mingyu nodding their head in agreement, flattening out any wrinkles on their satin skirt, the cerulean shade matching their lipstick. "Besides, he's not even showing yet. Wait, are you?" Jun asks, eyes drawn to Seungcheol's middle, squinting, as if trying to see the miniature humans laying inside.

 

"No? I tend to avoid looking at— _that_ area." Answer faltering, the sympathetic glances coming his way making tears well against his waterline.

 

_Stupid pregnancy hormones._

 

"I'm sorry, I'd imagine it hasn't been easy to cope with," 

 

_You don't have a clue._

 

❀

 

"Wow," Seokmin whispers in awe, palm hovering over the exposed skin of Seungcheol's stomach, Chan peering timidly behind him. "Can I?"

 

Seungcheol blushes, "Sure, but it's just fat. Hardly even a bump really," He says, hitching his shirt up higher, shuddering a little as Seokmin's cool fingers brush against his bare belly.

 

"How far along are you?" Chan asks softly from beside Seokmin's form, still not coming too close to the older male. Perhaps afraid that this could become himself, that he too might find himself in his hyung's position someday. 

 

"I'm twelve weeks on Friday. Almost in my second trimester." 

 

_And boy am I terrified._

 

❀

 

Seungcheol recieves a phone call from Jisoo and Jeonghan later that night, the persistent buzzing giving him a migraine.

 

But he doesn't dare press the green accept button.

 

_Sorry, but it's all in your favor._


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i rewrote this chapter bc i felt it needed to be happier??? idk :/
> 
> timeskip is like a month or so i guess? so cheol's roughly at 15-17(?) weeks now  
> also i fukin live for his and jihoon's friendship so that's here too (along with jun's almond milk)

“Should I go with midnight mauve or sparkling saffron?” Jihoon wonders aloud as they browse the winding isles of their local drugstore, Chan swinging the shopping basket around in pure boredom, not at all paying attention to the shorter girl's ramblings.

 

“The purple one.” Seungcheol answers with a dismissive wave of his hand, leisurely reading the back of a box of tampons, eyebrow arched at just how much information a floral themed cardboard box managed to contain (no, seriously, it's fucking impressive), the printed lettering getter smaller and smaller as he reads on. Though it’s not like he even really needs them anymore, no, it’s just a habitual thing so to say.

 

“Cool, thanks Cheol.” She says as she throws the dye kit in, grumbling over the price of the dammed thing, Chan obediently standing still with a roll of his eyes. Fidgeting at being cooped up inside for so long, blowing his bangs out his face with a huff. Muttering something under his breath about how his physics homework wasn't going to complete itself, sneakers toeing at the weirdly shiny flooring.

 

“No problem Hoonie.”

 

❀

 

"Lee _fucking_ Chan," Jihoon seethes, a handheld mirror clenched tightly in her hands, which are shaking with both a mixture of fury and mortification, blush resting high on her collar, contrasting vividly with her milky complexion.

 

Seungcheol peeping his head around the corner when he hears the sound of someone (Chan) being slapped, coming face to face with a tomato red Jihoon and a whimpering Chan, who's clutching at his cheek, a pinkish welt rapidly forming.

 

"Wha-?" He starts, before seeing the state of Jihoon's furrowed eyebrows, their usual dark color now an almost snow white. The corners of his lips starting to curl the slightest bit, to which he fights back a peal of laughter, not exactly favoring a sharp kick to his shins. Dark eyes twinkling with mirth as Chan flees the crowded washroom, reminding Seungcheol of a pup with its tail tucked in between its legs. Jihoon pouting as she crosses her arms over her chest, her hair still a mess of bubbly sludge, an old towel wrapped around her shoulders, a simple sports bra peeking out from under it.

 

"If Chan wakes up bald tomorrow, well, it's not _my_ fault." She mutters darkly, only to perk up when the familiar sound of her ringtone sounds from down the hall, ready to go pick it up when she remembers her current predicament, visibly slumping with a pout of her lips.

 

"I'll get it," Seungcheol helpfully offers with a faint smile, already beginning to pad down the hallway, before pausing abruptly, tripping over himself, "Ah, where is it?" he sheepishly asks, rubbing the back of his neck in the standard, clueless, go-to pose.

 

"Near the fruit basket." Jihoon supplies as she layers on more dye to her roots, concentration once again focused on the task at hand. Seungcheol humming as he heads off, wandering into the kitchen in no time, finding the phone right where Jihoon said it would be. Seungcheol's heart plummeting to the pit of his stomach when he sees the caller ID, which is none other than his American-born boyfriend. Welp, so much for escaping that.

 

Seungcheol's fingers shaking as they hover over the accept button, his mind torn between deciding to answer and not, which is really fucking sad honestly. Because who wouldn't answer their own partner? Ultimately deciding to let it go to voicemail, not particularly caring if Jihoon would later bitch at him for it. Mustering up all the courage in him just to listen to the stupid recording itself, nervously chewing at the inside of his cheek.

 

 _"Hoonie, when you have the time, can we speak? It's about Cheolie-"_ And with that Seungcheol stops the message, guilt making his tummy churn in an almost physically painful way, rushing to the trashcan just in time as he loses his lunch, staring down at the mess almost mournfully, ashamed that he wasted such a good meal. Ah, well there's no use crying over spilt milk Seungcheol supposes. The phone dinging as he's about to set it back down, and while he knows that yes, he _shouldn't_ intrude upon Jihoon's private life and all that shit, he can't help but to be _slightly_ curious, and besides, one glance _wouldn't_ harm anybody.

 

 **hoe:** u better get my almond milk bitch

 **hoe:** we ain't fucking if u don't ;)

 

Alright, so maybe next time Seungcheol should just stay in his own lane.

 

❀

 

"Do you mind restocking the paper towels Cheol?" Seokmin asks, his hands full of an assortment of items customers had ultimately left behind at the checkout, closing the storage closet door with a kick of his foot, Seungcheol looking up from his shitty 2DS, sighing with a nod as his treecko faints.

 

"Yeah, of course." He replies, hopping from the chair perhaps a bit too quickly, as a wave of intense dizziness washes over him, leaving him to tightly grip onto the counter to avoid falling altogether, blinking the dots away as he does so.

 

Seokmin pretty much dropping everything in an instant to rush to the older's aid, placing a hand on Seungcheol's shoulder to help stabilize him, even though that really doesn't do much.

 

"Is the _baby_ okay?!" And at that Seungcheol feels his eye twitch, annoyance beginning to creep up, fed up with the very term itself, as it was always the topic of conversation nowadays. His friends asking him this and that, like if he's thought of any names, when he's due, how far along he is, is he showing, etc...

 

He's quite honestly done with being pregnant at this point, even though he still has a solid five months or so left of it.

 

" _Babies_ ," He corrects crabbily, because fuck it, at least remember the other kid currently inhabiting his uterus too. "And yes, they're perfectly fine." Seungcheol adds with a bitter afterthought, the lightheadedness slowly but surely tapering off.

 

"You sure?" Seokmin asks yet again, oh so worried for his hyung, warm eyes watchful, Seungcheol unable to stay upset with the literal embodiment of the sun itself, an odd twinge of emotion bubbling under his skin.  _Stupid mood swings,_ he thinks, though he doesn't like to blame his sour attitude on such a crappy excuse, no matter how much truth might lie beneath it.

 

"Yep," Seungcheol reassures, offering the younger quite possibly the lamest smile the world has ever seen as he straightens up, hand coming to rest atop the soft swell of his belly instinctively, "We're good."

 

"Okay!"

 

❀

 

Later that afternoon Seungcheol and Jihoon meet up for lunch, the petite girl calling him up just as he finishes his first shift, her voice holding a hint of urgency that has Seungcheol frowning, Seokmin giving him a confused look as he starts to head out, the smiley male eating his own homemade bento at the register.

 

"Have fun hyung!" He shouts as Seungcheol waves him a goodbye, Seokmin's cheery persona certainly infectious, as he finds himself beaming right back.

 

"Of course!"

 

❀

 

"You need to talk to your boyfriends." Jihoon deadpans as soon as they're seated, menus not even flipped open, drinks left untouched and sadly all alone. Seungcheol fiddling with his sleeves as he reddens, eyes trained on the table in front of him, though he can still feel Jihoon's gaze on him nonetheless.

 

"I-" Beginning to make a shitty reason as to why he _hasn't_ , when she stops him with a glare, quite effectively shutting him up.

 

"Jisoo called me full-blown sobbing this very fucking _morning_." She whispers, as after all, they were in a public place, probably not wanting more stares than what she already received on a day to day basis.  _People are all judgment, with not a lick of understanding—he of all people would know this._

 

Seungcheol immediately remorseful for his childish behavior, the fact that he made Jisoo cry only making it a million times worse, like if someone ripped his heart out, stomped on it, before proceeding to shove it in a blender until it was nothing but mush.

 

"I'm-"

 

"Don't apologize to me, apologize to your boyfriend." Seungcheol nodding obediently at that, Jihoon's hard look making him fidget in unease, unable to tell if the goosebumps on his arms are from the chilly AC or the younger's ability to scare him shitless. Although the latter sounds about right in his opinion. 

 

"Yeah, I'll do that." He says softly, the babies fluttering as he speaks those words, like they're making him promise this, to actually have him commit in full. Something he should have done as soon as he found out he was pregnant in the first place, even if it meant making Jeonghan and Jisoo pause in their own lives, though Seungcheol knows deep down they would do so in a heartbeat.

 

❀

 

  
**joshy josh:** cheol

 **joshy josh:** are you pregnant

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm so sorry for not updating in so long! i hope junhoon's awkward fuck buddy relationship made up for that lol  
> also jeonghan? who is he? sorry i forgot to focus on him this time (￣ー￣；
> 
> anyways, the plot will thicken a shit ton next chapter and it's actually not angsty??? (or is it...)

**Author's Note:**

> this could become a multi-chaptered fic but it depends on how it's received tbh


End file.
